self care is the opposite of self harm

trigger warning, talking about self harm. If you aren't able to read my blog, then please take yourself over to a wonderful user led organisation called the Blurt foundation and read about self care https://www.blurtitout.org/resource/self-care-info/




If self harm is the opposite of self care, and if the law has recently come to recognise the damaging effects of emotional abuse suffered at the hands of another, then self harm should also include non physical acts.

I self harm, but in non physical ways. In silent, invisible ways, leaving no trace or no scar that anyone can see. This self harm thrives in the shadows, breeds off the shame and the guilt, and is made worse by the silence.

"Just because its in your head doesn't make it any less real."

Even the act of writing this out is hard. The thoughts of its not real, its not as serious as physical self harm are loud and noisy. The thought that no one will want to read it or understand what I am saying are motivations for me to continue, to fight back and say NO. This is real, and it is just as damaging as the physical harm people do to themselves.

Self neglect, not eating properly, being restrictive in some way, being negative about yourself. It is all self harm. For me, the worst is my really low self esteem, and guilt. When I start to look at all the actions I take against myself these 2 things are right at the bottom.

As I mentioned above, the answer lies in self care. Thanks to Blurt I am learning about the small ways I can look after myself and counter the negative emotional self harm that I experience. By having this vast resource means I can consciously "do self care". https://www.blurtitout.org/resource/self-care-info/

I have recently started to write out different ways I can practice self care for different areas of my life. My self care diet includes things like I should not feel guilty about any food I eat, or spending money on it. I am also learning to be gentle on myself, setting my alarm clock earlier so if I wake up and need some more sleep I can have some without feeling guilty that I have slept in.

The other big thing I can do to counter non physical self harm, is to talk about it. To talk about it in either way, at the self harm or the opposite end of self care. I find it easier to talk about self care, and share the positive things I am doing to look after myself, and I think that it really helps to talk about it.