As the lovely people from ATOS reminded me I have one more week to fill in my ESA50. Although 4 weeks isn't really long enough and I am currently going through hell trying to force myself to fill it in, I dont have a choice. You see the lovely, thoughtful people at atos will extend the deadline for you, if you ring them up. Seeing as I cant actually communicate on the phone when Im in a bad way, and if anyones tryed filling in one of these things they will know that every time I pick up the pen to write it will suck more energy and take me more effort to write than the hardest university essays, im not doing so well at the moment.
One week left of this hell, and then I am sure it will be a long time for them to make a decision, or call me into a medical, which will be another period of hell to content with. I thought this was meant to be a lovely positive new approach, looking at what you can do instead of what you cant. But then, seeing as it feels like I can do so little at the moment (its the affects of this form, highlighting how bad your life really is) there wouldnt be much to write about.
Filling in the form, it has made me go through so many emotions. Feeling like I am not worth anything, and I cant do anything to even thinking that I am somehow lying and its really not all that bad. Never mind the medicals, atos should be laying on mental health counselors to help people cope with the stress of this process. To have to make myself so vulnerable, and so let strangers read and judge the most intimate and distressing parts of my life in order to get enough money to live on is utterly degrading. The doctors letters and medical information doeskin seem to be enough anymore and this form of almost torture seems to have been slipped in unnoticed by the public in the name of fairness. Well, if your average man in the street had to declare how many times they became incontinent and give a great amount of detail about the reasons why and how before they received income, there would be outcry.
If you havent seen an ESA form or what they ask, I encourage you to grab a copy from the DWP website, google ESA50 form, its a revelation. And dont think that the questions they are asking relate in any way to the points you are being scored on, because they simply don't. There is a whole raft of information on what they actually mean and how to fill out the forms, if you know where to look that is. It doesn't surprise me that so many people are failing to get ESA when the questionnaire they send is so confusing. Take for example this one. It asks if you can go out on your own? Well, yes I can thank you very much. But then if you look at the sub questions it actually contradicts itself and gives away what it actually means. Can you go to somewhere unfamilar to you on your own? well my answer to that is no I can't. And thats just one question.
Perhaps, if these forms actually asked the questions the decision makers and the DWP actually wanted to know there would be less stress over the medicals, and more accurate claims happening. The medical examination is only one part of the process. The ESA50 is just as flawed, but doesn't seem to get as much attention. In the same way that people are fighting for an end to the WCA shouldn't we also be demanding a change to the ESA50 fit for work questionnaire? to me, that in itself is not fit for purpose, ironically.
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