Im sure I’m not alone in remembering the time that it dawned
on me, I am disabled. Whether that is as a child going to school or in my case
it was when I was first entitled to Disability living allowance. That name, my
new label. Disability.
Let me be clear, when I was first deemed disabled there was
no party. It isn’t like getting a job or graduating where people are actually
happy about it. It isn’t a status symbol. In a lot of cases it is about the
accepting of a new way of life, one of pain, shame and illness. It is, at first
a pretty negative experience.
I haven’t seen long queues at the doctors wanting to be
labeled as disabled, because of some perverse desire to be considered somehow
as ill. It isn’t (contrary to some
newspapers) an easy life. It is a difficult life and one that involves a
complete shift in perspective if you have become disabled after birth.
Now I admit there are financial “benefits” to this label.
However, these financial benefits
are far outweighed by the additional costs involved with disability. Whatever
sort of disability it may be. There are other, more personal costs as well. I
may have a free bus pass, but it comes with the knowledge that I will never be
able to drive.
I don’t know how many other disabled people have come this
far in their journey or even to the same point as I have. But I have moved
along way from that initial realisation of disabled.
For me, my disability was my own, completely circling around
me and my lifestyle and my choices in life. I can’t say I blamed myself, but I
did feel blamed and I guess in someway accepted that. I had been discriminated
against because I wasn’t well enough to go to uni, yes, it might have been
wrong, but the onus was always on me to change.
Until I started studying disability studies and slowly I
came round to social model thinking, that actually society could go a long way
to adapting to my disability and it was them that was making it harder for me.
And then I started to fight back.
I remember a particular conversation with my GP. She said to
me that she didn’t consider me disabled, and that she knew of others worse off
than me. At this point I was pretty clear on the social model and so I
explained to her that in fact it was opinions like that which made society disabling.
Apart from not knowing me personally she was trying to judge me differently to
what I perceived to be true. After coming away from that appointment I
considered, I am on DISABLED students allowance, DISABILITY living
allowance, I have a DISABILITY bus
pass. If those things didn’t make me disabled I don’t know what does.
The worrying thing for me is that the welfare reform bill,
and even ESA is actually going to make it easier for people to consider
claiming falsly for these benefits. By taking away the label DISABILITY or
INCAPACITY from the new benefits it also takes away the feelings associated
with acceptance of that particular
label.
When I got my DLA it was a weird experience, as I was happy
that I received it, but it was making a reality that I was really disabled. By
changing this to personal independence payment it refocuses it away from disability and blurs the lines quite
considerably.
I am not saying this to be negative, just to be
critical. When a person receives
Disability Living allowance there is a certain stigma attached and I hope, and
I guess this might be behind the low fraud rate. As I said before, no one is
queuing up to be labeled as disabled, and this Disability living allowance does
exactly that. Personal independence payment simply takes the disability out of
the benefit and replaces it with independence. The scary thing is that the
opposite of independence is dependence, and there will be 500,000 sick and
disabled people not entitled to be independent, and therefore, by default will
be dependant.

